First Post on Pakistan

I have constantly been thinking for the past six days that I have been here in Pakistan about how to portray a correct perspective without causing anyone to hate my experience.

Currently, everything is too different for me to be able to provide an accurate description, so I have decided to list some key things that I am currently liking or disliking (basically things that really stand out).

• I understand a bit more of what it means to live in the third world. If I could use three concepts to describe this world visually, they would be pollution, rust and graffiti.
• Pollution is the norm. I do not wish to belittle this society, but it is simply a fact that the definition of "clean" is simply very different from what is considered clean in American society. Areas that many consider very clean are in a condition that I believe would probably be considered a health hazard in the United States. I do not mean to imply that this society does not clean (because people here clean more than I have ever seen anyone clean), but simply that somehow, even after cleaning all day, things just don't become as clean as they do in the US: the dust just settles again, and the smell just never leaves.
• Everything is rusty. I have yet to see a shiny piece of metal. But there is something in the air that makes everything rusty. I know this for a fact because I bought a new shiny golden watch the day before my flight and brought it here for use. In the US, this watch would probably remain shiny for maybe two years. Somehow, within 24 hours, this watch is totally rusty. It looks more copper than golden. I am completely fascinated by how this happened. I am still in utter shock.
• There is no wall, or road, or freeway (if you can call them freeways) or street, that is not covered with large writings, all mainly in black. I would not call any of it art. Rather it is all political propaganda, promoting the government.
• I understand a bit more about what terrorism means.
• Harry Potter comes to mind often here. There is a new population of people that has travelled to this area, and they are known to be the ones causing much of the danger in the area. Therefore, I am constantly being warned about them, and people are constantly telling me that these people are the ones putting up the graffiti, and kidnapping people, and making things dangerous. However, you are not allowed to call them by their name. You are only supposed to whisper about them, and even then, always refer to them as "them." They who must not be named!  
• This society is obsessed with local and domestic news. Everyone is constantly watching the news. If there is any death nearby, people immediately text everyone in their contact list. Every single death, or firing, or kidnapping is talked about, and since there is something dangerous going on constantly, the environment is kind of depressing all the time (at least to me.)
• Everyone here is afraid I will get kidnapped. It scares me, but also somewhat annoys me.
• Some random things:
• I miss toilet paper. Can I admit something without being judged? I am not a theif, and I find stealing to be very unethical, but I stole a roll of toilet paper. I have no idea where to find toilet paper, and I have not seen it being sold anywhere, and I know it would be a very odd conversation if I asked my aunt to purchase toilet paper for me, so I stole a roll of toilet paper. I was initially assigned a room, at the place where I am interning, due to a misunderstanding. But two days later, I had to move out of it. Technically, I was not supposed to ever have received the room, and therefore, I was not entitled to keep the toilet paper roll in the fancy Americanized room. However, when I had to take all my stuff from the room, I took the toilet paper roll with me, because I was not sure if I would be able to find any toilet paper anywhere.
• I hate mosquito bites. I do not use bug spray that much, but I apply bug spray anytime I am going to the restroom. If I do not, I come out with at least 15-20 mosquito bites. The first few days, it felt like my entire body was on fire because I had so many mosquito bites!
• I often feel like my clothing has more sweat on it than actual cloth.
• Everyone expected me to be a brat who requires constant AC use, and who complains all the time about the mosquito bites. I do not complain about these things here, but the truth is that the American me complained all day in the US if I got even one mosquito bite, and at home, I constantly asked my mom to reduce the AC temperature. I currently have probably had maybe 150 mosquito bites at least, and I have been living without any AC for maybe 3 days.
• An aunt of mine was afraid of inviting me into her home because she felt that her home was not freshly painted, and the wall did not look nice. I am not really interested in the paint quality of homes- I just wanted to meet my aunt.
• The light goes off at least three times a day for about two hours each. Nuff said.
• The water comes on in the morning at around 7:05, and I am up at 6:30 every morning. Can you imagine waking up an not being able to use the restroom, or wash your face, or brush your teeth, or shower for even 5 minutes after you are awake? I think the water issue is my biggest issue. When I wake up, I really need water!
• I feel like I am constantly dirty, and I just desire to shower all day.
• I do not see people wash their hands as much. I desire to wash my hands constantly and yet I often cannot. Already I see myself washing my hand about three times as much as everyone. So often times, my hands feel so gross and oily, but I do not want to offend people around me by washing my hands so much. I try very hard to not be so high maintenance. I think a lot of them have the stereotype of the germaphobic, picky American. I think it is an accurate stereotype, but I desire to not be so obvious about it.
• I miss music so so much!! I want to listen to my english songs, or any songs in general. The van driver played some really old songs yesterday, but I was so happy to finally hear something musical, that I automatically had a large smile on my face.
• I hate that my phone balance runs out all the time. I miss my family in the US, so I call them often (maybe 20 minutes every other day or so), and my phone balance dies so quickly.
• I am afraid of using my camera because I fear it will be stolen immediately. That's because people are constantly afraid of using their phones in public, because phones are often stolen. Apparently, getting mugged is a common occurence and a constant fear.
• Nobody lets me pay for anything! I have not spent a rupee on anything, except when I am at the research lab where I go to eat lunch.

• More than anything, I feel so much love!!!! These people (my family here) barely know me, and I have not seen them in eleven years, but they really love me guys. How is that possible? How can there be so much love available in my share, and yet, I have been away from it for eleven years? I would be willing to give up almost anything to be able to have this much love around me all the time. If makes me feel whole!

That is all for now!